Not Suitable For Adults

I wandered in to work the other morning, humming a merry tune and trying to make my trousers not look as though they'd had an argument with my ankles, when I literally bumped in to my boss, who greeted me with, I kid you not, "EH OH!!" and offered me some "tubby toast" in the form of a slice of cheese. Yup, that's my big boss man! Conversation that morning was about The Telletubbies. Thankfully, we didn't change the topic to sex until quite some time afterwards. Talking about a child's TV show and sex in the same context just reeks of 'Paedophile'.

The Tubbies of course, consist of Tinky Winky, Dipsy, Lala and Po, 4, er, children-esque creatures of unknown species with TV screens on their stomachs, funny shaped ariels on their head and each with their own special item. The main message that this show seems to give across to children? 'TV GOOOOOOOOOOD!!! IMAGINATION BAD!!' Which contradicts what most parents should be telling their children, which is a fantastic start.

Next, the names of the damn things - Tinky Winky? The male tubbie who is quite clearly a raving poofter as his special item is a friggin' handbag! Judging by his name, he has a tiny penis too. Dipsy? With a straight ariel, which is quite obviously a symbol for him being a total knobhead. Lala? A ditzy blonde who is always in 'Lalaland' and finally Po. All the tubbies were blatantly named by children, Po was probably originally christened 'Poo' and censored. 'nuff said.

Tinky Winky has a handbag, a clear expression of his sexuality, and Dipsy has a hat. With a hole in it, rendering it useless anyway. The male tubbies have fashion statements, and the female ones have toys. Again, the males are clearly massive homosexuals - not that it's a bad thing, I just think it'll make children confused about how they should act when they get older. No wonder there are so many 11 year olds claiming that they're gay or bi. Lala has a massive bollock, sorry, BALL, clearly demonstrating her slaggish tendancies and she obviously is a fan of balls. Po is clearly on something - there's no normal way for her to be able to move so fast on that scooter.

The sun with the baby face is just terrifying, all the characters have OCD or ADHD or are on the autistic spectrum, or all 3 (Christ, my spelling's taken a tumble, hasn't it?) and there is a scene that has scarred me for life - a puppet running around a house and turning lights on and off. That's the sort of thing I have nightmares about.

But yes, I spent the rest of the day singing "Hat, hat haaa-aaaaat, hat!" with Sarah. We are adults. It was a lovely last day, seeing as I return to Derby on Saturday! Yeeeee!!! Oh, wait, did I say saturday? I meant to say "I was meant to enroll today, despite having already done so online!!!" So, it was up at 6 to get to Derby for 10 in order to just sit at a desk with some random woman, say "100147846", look at a picture of myself, and say "Yes, that's me." I spent 5 hours using almost a full tank of petrol covering almost 200 miles in order to say a mere 2 sentences.

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I'M A HAPPY CAMPERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, and I'm back on Plentyoffish.com. Again. Fishing is fun, and some conversations with a certain Mr provide a wonderful pick me up ^^ (No, of course I'm not writing this because I know he'll read it... :P)

My mum just came and presented me with a new sticker for my car. It says 'POTATO!'. My mum is awesome.

Attack On My Childhood

And doubtless many more childhoods. Remember the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? (Called Ninja for all of about 2 episodes until the name was changed to 'Hero' turtles as it was thought that ninja gave off too much of an agressive image.) I used to love them. I was a very boyish little girlie. Not much has changed - apart from the little girlie thing. Big girlie is more appropriate. Aaaaaaaaaaanyways my point is, as cool a show as it was, it did have its flaws. I know it is a cartoon and is therefore not real. In fact, I fear that society would break down if there were 6ft tall 'turtles' running around doing ninja things having been taught by a man turned in to a sewer rat. This is not my dig. My dig is the title, and the animals that they are claimed to be.

Turtles. This is incorrect. They are land-dwelling, so they are all tortoise. A turtle inhabits water, that is it only goes on land to breed. Hence they have flippers. The ninja 'turtles' do not. However, I will forgive this as it is clear that they are only turtles so they could fit the word in to the super cool theme song.

I spent the night getting attacked (verbally) by my boss, so why shouldn't I get to take my anger out on someone lower than me? That's what he did. Silly dick. Speaking of dicks, I completely forgot that my mum's leaving pressie for me was a hot water bottle, so I have been freezing my ass off for no reason. Fail. And Jade and I decided that I should have the job of walking behind fat people with a tuba. I'm good at it. I also managed to get a pikachu for my phone FINALLY! Video was ruined by hideous set of teeth wolf whistling at us and me yelling at them. Ughhhh, what it is to be female...

On an uber high, I FINALLY found a pair of those gorgey grey skinny jeans in my size! Soooo my extended overdraft, that I extended today in order to be able to afford Christmas, went towards it. No wonder I don't have any bloody money ¬¬