Showing posts with label piercings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label piercings. Show all posts

Sunday, 15 May 2011

Sex. That Is On Fire.

Simon Neil is the definition of this. You know, the lead singer of Biffy Clyro. He is married, so if anyone out there is the spitting image of him give me a ring. I will sex you up.

In other news, vodka is not my friend - after copious amounts of it I apparently ate fish food. I don't remember this. I woke up in bed, completely naked and with one shoe on the next morning. So kudos for Amz and Dakin for physically carrying me back home. Poor gits.

Insidious is a shit scary film, although I have now seen it 3 times and counting. Have now taken to sharpening my claws to Tiptoe Thru The Tulips by Tiny Tim and singing it endlessly, which is creepy on its own. Go and search for him. He is a creepy creepy man.

I am now well and truly situated at home in my usual position as the household's Lazy Bitch and have shit all hours at work. Following a complaint from me, I now have some of Adam's new bint's shifts, so I call that a small victory. I am now once again on speaking terms with Adam, following a tag team attack at 2 in the morning for 2 HOURS on wednesday while I was trying to frantically attack some assignments due the next day. Ever been insulted and called every name under the sun for 2 hours by your ex? For lots of people out there the answer is probably 'yes.' I bet the reason for your bile-filled attacks was hurt at the break up, or anger at the break up. My apparent wrong-doing? It is apparently Natasha's (the new bint) business regarding how many people I slept with BEFORE getting with Adam, as well as afterwards. WTF?!? He apologised to me today, but she has remained stoney faced. That's fine. I shall do my best to make her feel as uncomfortable at work as is humanly possible :) :) :)

Ever had to rip a broody chicken off of her nest? I have. Bloody hell, they peck for years! The silly bitch had been sitting on broken eggs anyway, and she was so angry about it! Believe me, I can tell. And Ponyo followed in her mother's footsteps and was a shit mother, so once again I have a new chick friend to raise. I called her Kiki, but Christian has decided to call her Winston. ¬_¬

Aaaaaaaaaaaaand I had my belly button pierced (finally) and it is now infected. Bugger. Er, that's about it. So yes. I is back methinks, hopefully for good. And hopefully I shall have something interesting to write about. XD

Sunday, 19 December 2010

Lots Of Nice Thi- Er, Beer!

My mother is amazing. End of. Although the video of this has now been lost (much to my absolute horror and disgust. This is why G should not be allowed to use a phone sometimes - instead of accidentally deleting the hideous video of me 'dancing' in the middle of a shop, he deletes my mother's hilarious requests for christmas gifts in a comedy beer hat ¬¬). Having spent the evening watching the Apprentice and wrapping what seemed to be 49875398475983749879 different christmas gifts I am chillaxing watching the Father Ted Christmas special. My chest hurts having spent the previous 10 minutes laughing - during the Apprentice mum paused the tv for 2 minutes (this is something I have still to get used to. The thought of pausing live tv is still somethinng of a great intrigue to me.) afterwards, G expressed a wish to watch the weather report. For all of 2 seconds mum flipped the channel, then instantly switched back - in those 2 seconds the lag created by the pause had caught up and the weather had literally just finished being reported. I have not seen him as amusingly annoyed before. Also hearing her pottering out of the room calling out about beer repeatedly was just as amusing.

Sooo I spent the night at my Mr's last night, afer spending a loverly (I know that is not how you spell it, that is how it needs to be said) day in Lynn. Following a wonderful Grand Theft Auto-esque move in to a parking space - after driving repeatdly up and down the car park, I spun my car around and instantly found myself perfectly parked in a space. Had I attempted this, I would have failed in a spectacular fashion - as I did earlier today when reversing on to Mazi's drive and ended up on her grass about 27 times. ¬¬ Speaking of Mazi, while nomming a Nandos (following a horrendous bumping in to my mother and G on the way there, which wasn't altogether that bad) Mazi came running in XD God I've missed her! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVER so much!

Watched Megamind too, which was a rather good film but was full of hideous screaming kids of course, and I ended up sat directly behind the only person in the audience above 3ft tall so I had to contend with his massive skull, as well as the 3 kids sat on the same row who obviously had bladders the size of a nucleus and who got up about 75 times each through the entire duration of the film. We could have just spent the whole film with Adam stood up and me with my legs annoyingly twisted away to save time ¬¬. Popped to the Globe afterwards to do some more Mazi bothering ^_^

The night was gooood until the morning, when I was alerted to an immense pain in my right boob (don't read too much in to it, sick sick people! This is my pierced boobeh!) and a horrendous wet feeling. Looking down I saw blood all over my shirt and all over the sheets, my boob still pumping out blood with gusto. Oh shitting hell FIRE! And holy hell, did it hurt! I must have caught it at some point (on my shirt!?!?) It makes me shiver at the thought even now. It wasn't fun. Also began turning in to my hideous allergy induced monster - I am rather allergic to cats, and EVERY place I stay at often (or will begin to :P) has cats living in it. Mazi has 2. My aunt has 3. Adam has too many to count ¬¬

Skating out of his road in the morning was awful, but not as awful as the woman on 10 Years Younger with no teeth. Yummeh mummeh! Running to meet Mazi I literally ran in to Liam, which was lovely. And after literally grabbing a subway we headed back to hers in order for me to fail at parking, laugh hysterically with her dad and drive Millie to MaccyDs in order to fail at parking some more. It's the simpler things in life that I love the most - although I really don't like the simple throbbing pain I am constantly feeling and the fact that I have to, yet again grabble with Chelsea for who has the most bed space and/or covers. Ugh. I cannot wait for tomorrow though - I has a meal with my nearest and dearest before heading back to work at Tuesday. Never thought I'd say this, but I really really miss KFC!!

Jesus, Leah steady on! First love, then love for your job what's next? NOT leaving your assignments until the last minute before even contemplating looking at them? PAHAHAHA! Good one!