Where Did You Put My Balls?

Yes Hayley, where DID you put my balls? My quorn meatballs, that is. Purchased of course so Lissi can do cooking things with them and I'm fussy and don't eat meat. Jamie, as in Oliver, will love me. The only reason I am mentioning that pain in the arse (Don't get me started. Just don't. Although he makes me laugh A LOT.) is because after watching the Inbetweeners (yet another funneh episode) I went to watch it again on 4OD and had to sit through an advert for Jamie's new show about breaking America. He cried about fat kids wanting their pizza and not wanting lettuce. I know he's devoted to the cause and everything, but that's also the saddest thing I've ever seen anyone do EVER. Look, if the fat fucks want to feed their fat fuck children nothing but pizza, let them. Don't try and fight them - their gargantum weight advantage means they ARE infact able to kill you with a single step.

Although I found the Inbetweeners funny, I do have a slight bone to pick. They went to see the new Saw film, which would have been Saw VI judging on the time the episode was filmed. At no point were the noises aired during the show EVER featured in the actual Saw VI. You may call me sad for being able to recognise that, but I luuuuurve the Saw films and also retain movie info like a sponge.

Up at the crack of 9:45 to do shopping things with Lissi. Bought an ironing board and draining board, along with an airer for pants and for big things. Am domestic goddess, quite clearly. Can do ironing and... dry clothes and dishes... and yeah, I suck and am lazy. Missed the bus to uni, typical me, so made Alicia wait to get the next one with me. I braved it today and took the bandage off my boob. Woo! Freshers' fair was packed, and people seemed to be making a beeline for me. Yeah, the bandage went straight back on when I got back. Had to actually say "Do I look like the kin of person that reads a bible?" In order to avoid being handed one. Alicia, Alex and I walked back together, which was fun times again.

I was ranting about the Bible thing to Hayley a little later on - I'm not being narrowminded, people can believe what they want, but Jesus supposedly died for our sins. Good for him. However, he did this thousands of years ago, and since then people have sinned and sinned some more, so it was pointless and crap. Also - the sins back then were "ohhh, I did kick on a sheep!" whereas today it could be something like "I hid hard drugs in the stab wound left by the knife I put in the back of my wife as she gave birth to her 3rd child that isn't even mine." God really would have a field day at that... So would Jeremy Kyle, for that matter. "You carried a knife around?! WHY DIDN'T YOU PUT SOMETHING ON THE END OF IT?!?!?" Um, he did - the back of his wife. Duh! ^_^

Had to be back in time for the asda delivery, so I panicked when it reached 2 and I was still walking up the stairs. Laura and Lissi were both in, and the delivery came at about half 3 anyway, so once again I panicked for bugger all reason. Alicia sent me a text telling of a scrummy new flatmate moving in with them downstairs - hmmmm, will deffo be going down again for some drinky games and movies, aka a gawk. Asda man came and made me trapse all the way downstairs. I got excited when he handed me a mere 2 bags. Before telling me he'd bring the rest of them to the door - all 10 or so of them ¬¬. Just at that point Hayley came home, so I didn't have to struggle alone. Plus I think I locked myself out of the flat at that point anyway, so her timing was impecible.

We lounged around for aaaaaaaages - she stole my ds :( (kidding, of course) and we had a moan about the spanish lot living next door to us, blasting their odd music out of their flat at all times. We heard the music. We looked out of my window. They were leaving. Fab! Oh wait, they left the bollocking music playing. How nice of them. They then started to shout up at someone in another flat. EVER HEARD OF A FUCKING MOBILE PHONE?!?! Shut up. Seriously. I know it was mid afternoon, but it was still a pain in the arse!

Hayley and I took the recycling out, to save the planet and be nice etc... and also so the cleaners would actually clean the flat tomorrow. Not that they actually clean it much - they just moved ALL the stuff from the kitchen counter on to the table, leaving it messier. So fail for you. All the recycling went in one skip, so we tipped it all in, our glass bottles smashing and coating the cardboard in a beautiful layer of glass and making as much noise as humanly possible, of course. We then realised you couldn't put glass in the skip. Woops...

We took the long way round to avoid the RAs who were stood watching us. One walked round to meet us, me laughing hysterically and hiding in my hoody, blates not doing a very good job. Come on - it's me. I'm about as subtle as a flamingo playing a game of hide and seek on a blank sheet of paper. Conversation was as follows:

RA: hey guys! Are you alright?
Leah: YEAH! *dies laughing*
RA: did you just put glass in the blue skip?
Hayley: Was it the blue one...?
Leah: YES!
RA: You're not meant to put glass in that one.
Leah: Ah. Well, I don;t think we were told.
RA: did you go to a welcome meeting?
Leah: yeah.
RA: You were told then
Leah: Ah... O_O We won't do it again!
*walking back to the flat, stood next to a window wide open, under which the RA is stood directly below*
Leah: WHY THE HELL DID HE ASK IF WE'D PUT GLASS IN THE SKIP? YOU COULD HEAR IT THE AMOUNT OF BLOODY NOISE IT MADE!!
Hayley: Leah, that window's wide open
Leah: O___________O I'm just gonna keep digging now...

Our tales certainly did cheer Lissi up a bit when she got home, as well as our wonderful cooking. I say 'our' but I was trying to work skype at the time. I did the last 5 minutes of pizza watch - blates the most crucial point and most important, of course. ¬¬. I say I was trying to work Skype, but it really didn't work. I couldn't work out why it wasn't doing anything for ages until I realised I wasn't even logged in to the damn thing. Twat. ¬¬ Then mum was just a big black box swearing a lot, much to Hayley's amusement. Had to go in time to watch the Inbetweeners, of course.

After that I had the wonderful 'music' coming from outside to serenade me while I blogged. It wasn't music. It was drunken 'singing' and 'guitar playing'. Hayley came in for another rant - the Spanish people are SO BLOODY LOUD! And were stopping her sleeping, bless her. Lissi called and asked me if I wanted to go to the pub, which the answer would be yes, but am shattered and have first lecture tomorrow. I know it's at 12, but want to be all fresh etc, and have been sleeping very little lately. Plus, it meant physically getting up and walking to the pub. And as I said before, I'm lazy :P